Starjones

Who among us has not considered stalking The View's Star Jones at some point in our lives? Even the most sober-minded and self-actualized person cannot be blamed for falling prey to her intoxicating "You go, Girl!" charm. In fact, one need look no further than the Buddha's Noble Truths (Revised, 2003) to find the folly in resisting her bewitchery: "All life is suffering, but Star Jones has got it goin' on! Snap!"

Given this, it seems unfair that, in this day and age, some people are still being discriminated against for their Jones infatuations. Case in point: one Mr. Christopher Monks, who was actually, in real life, denied employment within a public school system for having the bravery to come forward with his Jones-addiction and post his fan letters to Ms. Jones (regarding a large range of topics from the television personality herself to her husband Al Reynolds, and even the quality of life as a slave to robots in the future) on his weblog.

From Monks' own sad account in The Morning News:

"What would happen should a parent or student come upon your web site?
How would you respond to questions about your unusual interests?"

"My interests?"

"Yes, such as Star Jones," she said. The tips of her toes wiggled accusatorily.

Then I realized what was going on. The interviewer thought I was
actually stalking Star Jones. So I said what anyone would in that
situation: "I'm not stalking Star Jones."

As soon as I heard myself say the words, "I'm not stalking Star Jones," I knew the interview was over.

Later that day, I received a phone call from the school's principal.
When he told me I would not be continuing to the next step of the
hiring process, I asked if my blog had anything to do with it. Yes, he
said, it had everything to do with it

When will this cruel persecution come to an end? Please write your local congressman. You can help make a difference.