Matt Tobey
If
you're like most people, when you think of CollegeHumor.com, you think of a web-juggernaut primarily concerned with fart-lighting videos and beer-bong troubleshooting. So you'd probably be surprised to read this McSweeney's-esque bit of brilliance called Lines From Alanis Morissette's "Ironic," Modified to Actually Make Them Ironic. Here's a taste:
An old man turned ninety-eight. He won the lottery and died the next day… of chronic emphysema from inhalation of the latex particles scratched off decades' worth of lottery tickets.
And another:
A traffic jam when you're already late… to receive an award from the Municipal Planning Board for reducing the city's automobile congestion 80 percent.
Read the whole hilarious thing.
[Link via .:DataWhat:.?]
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okay, i'll admit it. i'm jon voight.
Milo Minderbinder is one of my favorite literary characters ever. And Jon Voight was hot in the movie.
We like you, Milo. We hope you're a regular person and not someone who works here too.
You certainly have. It must have taken you hours upon hours to write that paragraph and include those links to that other story.
and, pico, where did you find the time to write those eight words? i'm not even going to get into the period you included.
i started writing this post three days ago.
You have too much time on your hands.