Kittenpants
Oh, fan fiction! You live at the top of the nerd pyramid. You have special access to a VIP room of dorkness that nobody else will ever see. If geek is a planet, you are an entire galaxy. I salute you with today's post: Excerpts from the very best in Daily Show Fan Fiction.
LOTRfreak writes: Dear Stephen, in which Stephen Colbert has received a suicide note from his lover, Jon Stewart.
Best out-of-place IM shorthand: Jon signs his suicide note "-J.S. <3"
Reference to other works of fiction: Both Jon and Stephen are written as hardcore Lord of the Rings fans
Best line: "Run faster you pieces of [crap]!" he yelled to his legs.
Spacemonkey_699 writes: Something Strange This Way Comes, in which Rob Corddry discovers how his Daily Show boss takes charge of the staff, so to speak.
Best repeated typo: "Buttsex"
Reference to other works of fiction: The entire cast of Old School weighs in on Rob's dilemma
Best line: Luke Wilson was probably full of [crap]. Worse than his [!]damn crooked nose brother.
Mwah writes: To Serve Your Country, in which our heroes Jon and Stephen are called to duty by the Secretary of State. (More like called to Booty by the Sexretary of Sex!)
Best product placement: "Jon just sighed. “Did you bring the Gatorade?”"
Best line: THE SECRETARY OF STATE IS USING A DOUBLE NEGATIVE WHILE TRYING TO GET ME TO BONE HER!
Even Best-er line: Stephen suddenly grinned and Jon felt it go all the way to his toes. “Me too.” He winked again before swinging open the door. “Your boytoys have arrived!” he announced, spreading his arms wide to the darkened room before him.
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Loves it
So, you're quoting (without permission) and ridiculing fans of the shows. Fans of the channel. The people who make sure you get money. How very nice of you. Good grief…
Nice of them not to sue the authors though.
To: Kindling
Yes, of course. Because citing three sentences of writing that depends entirely on a franchise not the author's own, and depicting fictitious, imagined sexual encounters between real people without permission is totally, like, against the law. And the number of fans reading said fan fiction is, of course, so massive that their every tender feeling must be taken into account.
Spacemonkey's is by far the best.
CC Insider writes:
HAHAHA, mock the fans and their hobby, even though they're bothering nobody and only doing it for their own entertainment!
Best playground insult:
A blogger with imaginary status calling other bloggers "nerds".
Reference to other works of douchebaggery:
wonkette.com, February 17, 2005. It's sad but true, kittenpants — you are so two years ago.
Best implied intolerance:
Homophobia is, like, totally in style right now. If it's good enough for the cast of Gray's Anatomy to bring to the Golden Globes, it's good enough for mobilized frat boy CCinsider readers to take to LJ. They don't even have to do much work — you gave 'em the usernames and everything! Bash away, kids.
Good times!!
You could have at least quoted some of the better-written pieces instead of working from a pool of the first ten or so drabbles you saw. We might be slightly creepy, but some of us do it with well-formed plots and good grammar.
Wow. How pathetic are you?
Trying to elevate your own overinflated (and completely undeserved) ego by pointing and laughing in your best middle-schooler self just makes you look like an asshat.
If I make fun of really bad fiction about women, does that make me a misogynist?
Everything in geekdom has been fic'd and slashed. Be proud! You stand alongside Star Trek, Star Wars and LOTR.
QUOTE: Best repeated typo: "Buttsex"
****************************
I prefer to spell it buttsecks, thank you very much.
Why would they want to sue the authors? Fanfic about real people is completely legal (morally ambiguous, yes, but legal). Real people, unlike imaginary characters, cannot be copyrighted.
For the record, I would just like to point out, as far as gay innuendos and speculation about Condi's love life go: they started it, not us.
So has anyone tried the Gatoraid AM? Does it taste like jizz? 'Cause all of the other flavors do.
I've heard of fanfic efforts for extremely complex pieces of fantasy, but comedy news? Is there really all that much missing from your life, or is LOTR just a little too far out of your range?
By the way, I just published a Cliff's Notes for Robot Chicken. You know, in case anyone's interested.
Where's the cream filling?
[No, no, really. Why bother to do a guest blog if you're going to generate a skimpy paragraph of content? Give us something to sink our little teeth into.]
Wonderful crack, these fics. Oh, and Jon/Stephen started it.
"I've heard of fanfic efforts for extremely complex pieces of fantasy, but comedy news? Is there really all that much missing from your life, or is LOTR just a little too far out of your range?"
Because all LOTR fanfic is deep, complex, and well-worded? And the Daily Show fanfic is not? Right.
I'm sure kittenpants' post is all in good fun, but let's not mock the slasher fans too much. They've already been outed a long time ago – and Jon and Stephen provide plenty of inspiration every week.