comedy central insider
From the writers of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart…
Prepare yourself, because this might be a shock to the system: apparently, a high-ranking White House official… told an untruth.
Yes, I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, Vice-President Cheney's former Chief-of-Staff, was found guilty on four counts arising from the outing of Valerie Plame. As a CIA agent, that is. Not a lesbian. Well, pretty sure she's not. Shoot, this is how rumors get started.
No sooner had Libby been convicted, than Democrats began calling on President Bush not to pardon him. Although Libby's camp has responded that it would honestly just prefer Bush officially change his nickname to "something more like Rambo."
However, it wasn't just Libby who was unhappy. A juror in the case spoke with reporters following the verdict and he said that while Libby is certainly guilty, the jury was convinced others in the administration were even more culpable, stating, "I wish we weren't judging Libby, you know? This sucks… Where's Rove? Where's, you know, all these other guys?" The juror was then informed they're all at the orgy, celebrating the conviction of "anyone but them."
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What's all this talk about the Democrats being first to elect a minority President when every good Republican knows George W. Bush already has that title, first elected by a minority vote and then serving with a minority of American and world support, and many successfully argue that he unwittingly represents the mentally and intellectually-challenged minority who repeatedly have asked that he step down from their Cross of Honor.
There is only two things that really bother me about this.The first is how on earth did a baby boomer who proudly answers to the name "Scooter" got that far up the chain!The second thing is,why all the hoopla?I mean lets be honest if the verdict stands then all that has really happened is that his life has made a lateral move.Whether it's Cheney or some 300 pound love starved cell-mate.A bitch is a bitch!
Scooter Lied
(To the tune of “American Pie” by Don McLean)
Words by Jeri Roth Lande
A long, long time ago…
You can’t seem to remember
Anything you said before your trial,
But you thought if you had a chance
That you could make that jury dance
And, maybe, they’d be happy for a while.
This February we all shivered
Schools were closed but pizza delivered.
A snowflake seen in Rockville
Will panic more than bombs will.
Can you remember if you cried
When your bosses said you couldn’t hide,
And let you start your downward slide
The day that Scooter lied.
So bye-bye, Scooter Libby, goodbye.
Looks like Cheney said “don’t blame me”
And hung you out to dry.
Them good old boys were shooting quail from the sky
Singing, “Fall on your sword, boy, and die.
Fall on your sword, boy, and die.”
Now for two months you’ve been on your own
And Rove won’t talk on the telephone.
But that’s not how it used to be.
Now everyone says that you must confess
Especially Russert from Meet the Press.
In a voice that’s known for honesty.
Oh, and while King George was getting soused
The Democrats just took back the House.
The courtroom is adjourned;
A verdict was returned.
Though others outed Agent Plame
They want you to take the blame
The coverup’s just part of the game.
The day that Scooter lied.
So bye-bye, Scooter Libby, goodbye.
Looks like Cheney said “don’t blame me”
And hung you out to dry
Them good old boys were shooting quail from the sky
Singing, “Fall on your sword, boy, and die.
Fall on your sword, boy, and die.”
Tit for tat, Valerie has now outed Scooter as a lying faggotaboudit, with Fitzgerald's help.
this is what holdin my mud looks like
I won't be happy till peaches is in the can.
Awesome rioting footage on The Daily Show the other night. Remember when they rioted in Hungary last year when a politician lied? Ah, they are so cute and innocent over there!
I heard the Veep calls Libby the "litte green sprout".
His secret service code name was Delmonte.
I'm proud to say there is an alternative for voters this next time around. And what makes it better is that she's a beautiful blonde. Check her out: http://www.VoteBonnie.com