Patton Oswalt's Blind Item: Soupy Sales?

Patton Oswalt posted something on his blog yesterday that is both an inspirational anecdote for aspiring comics and a juicy comedy-gossip blind-item:

The national headliner was sitting in the living room, silently.   He had been waiting for me.

"I went into your room," he said.

I said, "Oh."

"The
clock radio in my bedroom only has one alarm.  Yours has two alarms and
a snooze option.   So I swapped them out.   I wanted to make sure you
knew what I did, so I've been waiting here."

I said, "Oh."

"I mean, you realize, me being the headliner, you having two alarms and a snooze option, as the emcee, is unfair."   Now that I write this, I remember now that he stressed the word "unfair".

For the valuable lesson Patton gleaned from the encounter, along with two more affirmations, click here for the full-post. After that, drop your guess as to who the unnamed douche-y roommate might have been in the comments.