Drunk

2009 is finally upon us, so it's time to take part in that storied New Years tradition of writing blog-posts a couple weeks in advance so it looks like the blog is being updated while we drink until we puke blood and pass out in our own filth. With that in mind, here are some New Years resolutions we plan on stick to at least until MLK Day.

I resolve in 2009 to make to you, and keep for the year, the 2009 Comedy

Central Insider Eyes Wide Shut Promise. To wit, I pledge that every

writer, at least one time per week, will make a joke or reference to

Eyes Wide Shut on this here very blog. 2009CCIEWSP, look for it in 2009!

-Andrew Ti

I resolve to snack more, but eat less.
-Eric March

I resolve to find out what that fog on LOST is before

they hire Stephen King to write something that kinda makes sense but

still leaves the viewer disappointed.
Note: I'm still only season 2, so people already might know and still be disappointed.
-James Smith Jr.

I resolve in 2009 to find religion, and then

promptly return it to the lost and found, where it belongs. I also resolve to

travel the country talking about porn, because I believe if people knew more

about it, they wouldn't judge me for being addicted to

it.
-Gonzalo Cordova

I resolve to bring in lots of snacks for Eric to eat.

-Karen Lurie

I resolve in 2009 to watch reruns of CSI: NY on Spike TV regularly at

10 am and still maintain my appetite for lunch — a lunch that will

consist primarily of human innards.
-David Nagler

I resolve to write a rock opera called "Lehman Brothers

Superstars" and get Ian Gillan from Deep Purple to sing the part of

Henry Lehman and then turn the whole thing into the worst movie ever

made. (Hopefully, Norman Jewison will be available to direct.)
-Dennis DiClaudio

I resolve to not reveal that the password is Fidelio.
-Matt Tobey