Jimmy Fallon begins his tenure as the host of Late Night tonight and, like all late night hosts worth their salt before him, has some thoughts on his biggest competitor — the Letterman to his Leno, the Abu Ghraib to his human decency, the orange chicken to his General Tso's chicken…

Of immediate concern: Fallon will have to fend off the encroaching ratings of CBS rival Craig Ferguson, who overtook Conan O'Brien in viewership for the first time last April.

"I'm not thinking about Craig Ferguson, I'm not thinking about Jimmy Kimmel," Fallon said. "My biggest competition is sleep."

Since we're about to get Jimmy Fallon vs. sleep every night, it is clear that the zeitgeist is primed for Eric March vs. breathing and pooping. How 'bout it, ABC?