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June 3rd 10:39AM by Matt Tobey

Daily Show: Which Assault Rifle Is Best for Your Portfolio?

From real estate to the stock market, it seems like there's no safe place to invest one's money these days. I even tried stuffing my money in a mattress and still lost 18%. But, as with every single other problem that can possibly ever be presented in life, semi-automatic assault rifles might be the answer.

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

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