I like to get my stand-up from men in leather jackets who have won a Michigan Emmy. You may ask, "Why narrow it down like that?" And I would look up from my panini and say, "Meet Michael Kosta, he fulfills all those requirements and his Comedy Central Presents special airs this Friday, January 21 at 11:30/10:30c." Then you and I would high five. Read Kosta's answers to our questions below and click past the jump for a look into his comedy bag and a leather-clad preview from his special.

What adjective would your mom or best-friend use to describe you?
Well those would be totally different. Best friend? Sarcastic. Mom? Under achieving, loud, obnoxious, self centered, disrespectful, sexy.

If you could commit a crime with any historical figure, who would it be? What crime would you commit?
I would get drunk with Jesus and try to convince him that his dad isn't real. It's a crime because I forgot to mention that we're both naked and we're at an elementary school.

How do you like your coffee/women/men?
On my pants.

What is your breakfast of champions?
You mean at 2pm? Usually whatever the last comedian left in the comedy condo fridge.

Do you have pets?
Not currently. When I was a kid we had a dog named Daisey. He bit me. The next day my dad told the family that he "took Daisey to a farm." I think we all know what that means.

Do you like men/women with pets?
I don't understand the women with tiny dogs who expect us to care about their pet. Are you going to sleep with me or not? Because if not, I'll stop petting "Abigail" and ask to get this check split.

What do you do when you are not doing comedy?
Fulfill TV network blog obligations.

Comedy Central Presents Michael Kosta premieres Friday at 11:30/10:30c, right after Comedy Central Presents Tom Segura.